Dear Great Indoors,

I am writing this letter to let you know that I think you suck.

When I read on craigslist that you were having a job fair today I was a little hesitant to attend. In all honesty I am way over qualified to work for you. But, being in a place where I cannot afford to turn down any work, I swallowed my pride and decided to attend your "job fair". Now between you and I, I use the term "job fair" loosely because clearly, and lets be honest, there was no job fair to be had.

From what I saw it was just a cattle call for people to fill out job applications. For all I know it was some hidden camera show for 20/20 to show the desperation for jobs in today’s economy.

There wasn’t even an HR rep present to talk to anyone. You just had a pile of applications for people to take and fill out. And since there was no actual meeting of any applicants with anyone in HR, I am sure that my application will sit in a pile on your desk and never even get looked at. I might as well have said "here, you throw this away" to your assistant who was placing finished applications in a box for “review”.

I understand the need to fill out an application. It has to be done. But you know all those people there( myself included) got dressed in their Sunday bests and made the trip to your location and you wouldn't even take five minutes to meet anybody. Not even a quick "Thanks for stopping by. We'll be in touch"

That takes real class.

Another thing I don’t understand is the personality test you wanted every applicant to take as well. Now, pardon my French but you can take that “personality test” and f#$% off. Seriously. Who do you think you are? You don't even have any people skills and you want me to take a personality test?

What does the validity of whether or not I prefer chicken to fish have anything to do with my ability to help someone pick out bath tile? And another thing, how on earth do you expect to find a decent applicant based on answers to a personality test that was probably devised by some old man in a barn who eats mayonnaise sandwiches and listens to Fox News all day.

Shame on you.

It has to be said, having been on a few job interviews in my time that the pseudo interview I had with you today was one of the worst I have been on. It was a giant waste of my time.

It was right up there with the interview I went on back in 2004 where a frigid woman basically told me I dressed like a harlot. And yes, it was even as bad as the interview back in 2007 where a prostitute was thrown from a moving car right outside where the interview was taking place. I guess things really do come in threes, including shitty interviews.

Peace Out.